WK2 - the Return of McGuire

Happy Monday, my dear select-GM's.

We're two weeks into Randy's Children and we've yet to hear from our in-house (and possibly in-bred) star analyst, Pierre McGuire.

But not to worry; Commissioner Randy has in place an industry-leading high value retainer fee with McGuire, so he's here, forever. There's no escaping his analysis. So, shall we get to the weeks stats report, courtesy of the stats machine?

Adds McGuire: Heck yes!

Adds McGuire: Another strong, strong week for Safari. He was this week's top point accumulator, generating 78.75 fantasy points and maintained his lead over the pack. He was about 10 fantasy points better than Sitch and Burgundy, both who are still in hot (puck) pursuit. Tree Bone, however, misfired and generated a League-low 37.90 fantasy points.

Adds McGuire: Safari continues to lead PPGP as well, defecating on his competition by maintaining his roaring 4.61 PPGP (+0.01 since last week). Commissioner Randy said that a PPGP of this pace is unsustainable, but for now Safari's team is running like a well-oiled machine. Burgundy now sits second with a more 'realistic' PPGP of 3.79, followed by Sitch with a 3.74. Tree Bone sits fourth with a 3.11 (though this is down -0.25 since last week), while Dick Burns sits fifth with 2.34 (+0.24 since last week). 

Adds McGuire: As we can see through the Rainbow, Safari continues to dominate player stats; he's scoring at a respectable rate, but the big difference is that he's generating a very highly number of assists too. I find this very interesting, considering that in prior years select-GM's usually have to pick a side; they either try to be scoring leaders (goals) or other point leaders (essentially, being well-rounded in all other stat categories). Safari, for the time being, is holding court in almost all other areas, so he's giving zero fucks to historical standards.

Adds McGuire: No change in the rank; Safari has been the leader for two weeks straight.

Thanks McGuire.

In other news, I've heard whispers, rumours and tales floating about...

Aside from dedicating efforts to Randy's Children, each and every select-GM also #HAMs their other duties as citizens of the world. Whether it be conquering the field of fitness, mastering penial analytics, controlling the population of lynx, bossing children around or making people laugh, the select-GM's of the Randy Leagues put forth enormous effort to ensure they are the best person they can possibly be.

With this in mind, I've been informed that Safari will be making an employment transition to one of the most well-respected, highly innovative and influential companies in the world. Likewise, Sitch is also making an employment transition; it's been in the works for quite some time, slowly making its way like the flow of honey.

"Good things take time," said a tight-lipped Sitch. "Don't do it fast if you ain't doin' it right."

"That's what she said," chimed in Dick.

Wise words, Dick.